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Don’t manage anger, eliminate it
Anger is not a possibility even if you want. Our relationships and experience with others is an exact reflection of our own self. If you fill yourself with happiness, then there is no place for other negative emotions.
Many times we come across situations where we lose our temper and get angry on someone or something. We try to avoid such circumstances as it creates some kind of a discomfort in us. Beyond this, when someone makes you angry, you are actually giving them the power to control your emotions. Knowingly or unknowingly, you are giving someone the power to control you on an unconscious level. You are not under your own control. When you say someone is making you angry and you have no other choice but to get angry, it means that you are dependent on someone to maintain your state of happiness. But the truth is no one can make you angry when you become the source of your happiness.
Source Of Anger
Everyone has a reason to get angry on others. When you try to find the source of that reason, it is actually not the person but it’s the thought about the consequence that you will have to go through in the future, that makes you angry. You feel that the other person’s activity has not only irritated your present state but is also going to affect your future. For instance when you assign a job to someone and that person doesn’t complete it on time, you get angry thinking that this delay is going to affect the end result or the process on the whole. You lose your temper and get angry. But is your anger going to change anything? The answer is NO. Your anger is not going to change the situation; it’s only going to affect your strength and health. Then what is the point in getting angry? So, make sure when you assign a job to someone, always remember that you should never doubt the process or the person. Thinking deeply, you will realise that the people who make you angry are already known to you that they will make you angry. Therefore the problem is not with others. Every relationship and experience with another person is nothing but the exact reflection of the self. Just try to make a list of the people who made you angry in the past and the ones who you believe will make you angry in the future. Now ask yourself as to why you were angry with them and why do you think that some are going to make you angry in the future. You will find an answer. You think that their behaviour or their approach is going to spoil the growth that you are planning for the future. On one side you feel that their association is going to disturb your present moment of happiness. On the other side, you are not able to avoid their presence or extract the work you want from them in a proper way. In other words, you are not happy with their performance or association. But this should not be taken as a reason to get angry on others all the time. Instead start dreaming and visioning a positive end-result accepting others as part of this process and always think that what you want will happen smoothly in the way you want. If you feel that a person is not fit to be associated with, then happily remove him. Knowingly if you still continue to be associated with the person who is not fit to be in the relationship, then nothing will change. You will live out of anger and you will always be in anger.
Power Of Blessing
Instead of losing your temper at a given situation, start blessing that person and give yourself a second chance. Blessing has lot of powers. Beyond all the knowledge that your brain is acquiring and possessing, there is something called “emotion” which is never under your control and to bring it under your control, you need a link between you and your Atman in a very profound and peaceful way. The so called superficial love and sweet words are of no use because blessing is the only thing which will give the energy for your soul and the other person’s soul to fall in alignment and bring the end result in a way you want. So, we all must realise that anger is not a possibility even if we want.
The Truth About Happiness
At this point, you should understand a beautiful truth that happiness cannot be found outside of you, it’s present within you. If any of the other emotions like anger, fear, frustration, disappointment etc fills your mind, it simply means the absence of happiness. To put it simple, when you are in a state of happiness, there is no possibility of anger or other emotions to make their presence. What is the highest truth about happiness? Being a spiritual person who is in absolute knowledge about the existential reality, finding happiness within one self is not an easy task. But it’s a fact that it cannot be found anywhere else.
Wishing you a Life Full of Peace, Success & Abundance.
Atmayogi Shri Aasaanji
Aham Brahmasmi !
Atmayogi Shri Aasaanji is a non-religious, contemporary Spiritual Master and the founder of the Atmayoga Foundation (Institute for Inner-Science and Self-Transformation) www.atmayoga.in