No filter: Chennai family breaks stigma surrounding adoption

Elavanchi Chandran, the designer behind the brand Yoshnas, with quiet confidence, posted a screenshot of her adoption waitlist as she couldn’t contain her excitement and unwittingly started a social media storm.

Surprisingly, the messages that came pouring in were largely positive, indicative of the changing times. She tells me that she received over a hundred phone calls with people enquiring in detail with regard to the adoption process and others for advice on how she convinced her near anddear ones.

Without skipping a beat Elavanchi tells me, “Please don’t glorify what I’m doing — I am a mother and we are a family looking to add to our brood. We took the decision to adopt instead of having a second biological child. As much as the orphaned child needs a home and a family, we wanted a second daughter. So the child coming into our home is doing us a service by accepting us as her family.”

She tells me she can’t wait for the day when adoption is not a big deal and there is no stigma attached to it. The idea occurred to Elavanchi while she was still in college and she had the good sense to not broach the subject with her family. Later, she got married to Suresh Marimuthu and after having their first child, she brought up the topic of adopting a child as she wanted her daughter to have siblings as Elavanchi herself grew up with two. To Suresh’s credit, without skipping a beat he asked Elavanchi if she had thought it through and when she said yes he said okay without any fanfare. They spent the next few months brainstorming potential issues and scenarios they would face. They also took the time to explain the concept of adoption to their daughter, who was only four years old. It took close to eight months as the little one understood that siblings came from the mother’s belly. Then they started the process of registering with the Central Adoption Resource Authority (CARA). Two years after registering and undergoing the counselling and verification processes, they have moved up the waitlist from 978 to 98 and this sparked joy and resulted in the now-famous post on social media. It’s a long and arduous journey and close to 50 per cent of registered parents drop out but for this determined family, the end is hopefully in sight and they can welcome their second daughter home. Their daughter, Yoshna, has already decided that her sister will be named Harini. This unassuming Chennai family are making waves just by living life on their own terms and I’m hoping they inspire others to consider adoption. Sometimes, all it takes is one person to turn the tide and Elavanchi and her family just might have done that.