With all the experience and knowledge you possess, trying to live without fear is not a possibility when you don’t have the real knowledge about the self. You are mature enough to replace the fear with a word called ‘faith’. This may be shocking but that is the ultimate truth. You keep yourself occupied with various belief systems or faith because you want to be away from fear; still you’re not living without fear. Is it possible to live without fear? It is possible; that’s the joy of spirituality.
We human beings live out of commitments. This is where I want all of you to realise the difference between responsibility and commitment. Responsibility is a natural outcome once you take in charge of your commitment. I am talking about simple commitments on a daily basis. You cannot live as you want. A man is not just a man; he is a son to his mother, a husband to his wife, a brother to his siblings, a father to his son and a friend to his friends. The same thing applies to a woman. From the time you are born, you play different roles and have commitments to satisfy various expectations from various people.
CONFLICTS IN RELATIONSHIPS
Conflicts in relationships arise when you are not able to deliver the expectations that are expected from you in a relationship. A happy life is promised not when you educate yourself with knowledge or equip yourself with the best skill, but by living a life without conflict. This is where one has to understand that conflict is entirely different from love. Even in the most loving relationship, conflicts can exist. A mother loves her children to the most, but still she may have conflicts when she is not able to see the life that her children want to live. She has an expectation from them. When they are not met, conflicts arise. A conflict-free relationship is promised only when you understand what your expectations from others are and what others expect from you in a relationship.
GIVING WHAT YOU HAVE IS NOT COMMITMENT
Always tell yourself that you can’t share anything to anyone from an empty cup. Many people do the mistake of satisfying others without satisfying their own self. This is like pouring from an empty cup. This results only in disappointment and frustration. Sometimes what you do from your side is totally different from what others expect from you. This is because you are not aware of what you have when you share. This is the ultimate reality in relationships. At times, you feel that your loved ones are not happy in spite of you doing everything for them. The point is that they are not getting what they want. This is where you need to understand that commitment is not giving what you have; it’s giving what they want. Now you take responsibility towards commitment, not just action. Involve yourself in action with commitment to either give what they want or to not to give what they don’t want. That which you feel is best for you need not be the best for others. In a relationship, when you insist that which is best for you has to be the best for the other person, you can never experience happiness. It will only give rise to conflicts.
HUMAN MIND - A GARBAGE COLLECTOR
You as a human being have got no power to stop thoughts coming into your mind. When we talk about sharing, it doesn’t mean only physical things; real sharing starts from the heart through the thoughts. You don’t have control over your physical things, but you certainly have control over the vibration caused due to your thoughts. Once you fill yourself with good thoughts, knowingly or unknowingly, you will share only good thoughts with your loved ones. So take effort to remove all negative thoughts from your mind and fill it with full positivity. Consider this simple example.
When a container is contaminated, how much ever pure water is poured, the water still remains impure. Consider your mind to be a garbage collector or trash. You can’t avoid your mind getting polluted due to negative thoughts. A garbage box has no other choice but to get filled with waste but with the mind, you have a choice, you can empty it every day. Your mind can’t escape from getting negative thoughts, but remember that you can remove it in an easy way. Consider two trash boxes – one which is filled with minimal trash and dust, kept unclean and closed for a week, and another box which is overflowing with waste and rotten vegetables, etc. but removed and cleaned every day. Obviously it is most scientific, practical and logical to understand that the garbage box which is cleaned regularly will have almost no virus or foul smell, whereas the other box which is cleaned only once in a week, will result in the accumulation of numerous viruses and unavoidable stench.
Why am I saying this when talking about relationship? When you are in relationship, one has to accept the truth that you have no idea about what you are going to experience from the people you are associated with. One needs to accept this truth. Speaking nice and sweet words can make you feel good in a relationship but I am talking about genuinely experiencing a real good feeling. You don’t have an idea about the other person’s behaviour in a relationship. So, look at the experience you had with them and take effort to remove the unwanted emotions in that experience. Once you start doing this on a regular basis, no matter how much ever bad emotions come your way, nothing can affect you. If you don’t clear the bad experience that happened ten years before, it is like a garbage box which is kept closed. The bad effect will be maximum. When you start clearing it every day, there is no possibility of bad emotions in the present and in the future.
WHEN YOU HAVE THE FEAR OF FALLING, YOU CAN NEVER FEEL THE JOY OF FLYING
You need to cleanse your mind every day from unwanted negative thoughts. How do you do it? This is where meditation plays an important role. With the help of meditation, you can make sure to keep your mind clean so that you’re not affected because of the bad effects. It doesn’t mean you will always a bad experience in your life. When you don’t have a clarity that good things are going to happen no matter how bad a situation is, you will never live a good life. Meditation is the only process which will reinforce the real self to realise that everything will have a good end, no matter what. It may be a little difficult in the beginning but you will understand that it is a requirement for you to act in the present situation to face the future without frustration and failure. This is the way one can prepare oneself to live up to the expectation in a relationship which we call as real commitment. Only with this process of understanding and discipline to meditation, we gain miraculous power. It’s a fact that when you have the fear of falling, you can never feel the joy of flying.
MIRACLE POWER OF MEDITATION
The choice is yours now. If you commit yourself to the process of meditation and stand up to the expectation in relationship, you will automatically see the shift that you have never imagined both in personal and professional life. This is when you take the most courageous step to move forward. You may not know what is going to happen but you will be sure that it is happening for good. This courage is possible not by physical exercise, religious rituals, strengthening the psychology or any mind power technique. It’s possible only by the power of the self which is possible only by committing to meditation. You will now have all the courage to fly high without the fear of falling and you will enjoy the feel of flying in every aspect of life.
Wishing you a life full of peace, success and happiness!!
Atmayogi Shri Aasaanji
Aham Brahmasmi !
Atmayogi Shri Aasaanji is a non-religious, contemporary Spiritual Master and the founder of the Atmayoga Foundation (Institute for Inner-Science and Self-Transformation)